Spoons
This post reflects on our evaluation of time and energy. Highlighting the 'spoon theory', it explains how we often have the time but lack the needed energy.
Anne, a friend and colleague, publishes a weekly newsletter called The New Crop. In a recent edition, she talks about "the lie we tell ourselves about time."
This really hit home for me. I have a zillion things I want to do outside of work, and yet, somehow, almost none of them get done.
When I reflect on this, these are the thoughts that cross my mind:
I want to do x, y, z.
I don't have time to do x, y, z.
Wait… I have time to binge-watch Succession, Futurama, the entire previous 34 seasons of The Simpsons, but I don't have time to do things I believe would have a meaningful, positive impact on my life?
Where does all my time go?
Oh, right… TV.
So, do I have time?
Or don't I?
One of the things I didn't have time for was this blog.
In reality, there's time to accomplish some, or perhaps even most, of the things on my mental list. But it's not as straightforward as just having the time. There are tradeoffs–it's not like there are huge blocks of time when I'm doing absolutely nothing (unless you count watching TV as nothing 😂). Do I want to give up sleeping in? Or cut back on TV? Or read less for fun?
The more I thought about it, the more I realized that it's not necessarily a matter of lacking time. It's that I don't always have enough spoons. If you're not familiar with spoon theory, spoon theory is a way of describing how much mental and/or physical energy a person has available. In effect, saying you're out of spoons or don't have enough spoons, is saying you don't have the mental or physical capacity for something at that moment.
So what I'm really feeling when I don't do the things on that list is that I don't have the energy. The time is there, but the willpower and motivation are not.
After using my brain all day for work, the last thing I want to do is spend even more time at my desk, whether for reading, writing, or learning.
Women these days are told we can have it all. Check out Women can have it all! for a laugh (or perhaps a good cry, nothing wrong with that). It's exhausting just to want it all; I can't imagine having it all.
And I don't even have human kids!
The point? We don't have to have it all. We don't have to even want it all. And we certainly don't have to do it all.
However, the point of this post is to talk about how we go from not having the time to actually doing what we want.
Here are some tips:
Shift Your Mindset: Instead of saying, "I don't have time," try reframing it as "I don't have the energy right now" or "I'm choosing not to do it at this moment." This mental shift can help you better understand your priorities and make more intentional choices.
Conduct a Time Audit: Take a closer look at how you spend your time. Create a time log for a week to track your activities. This will give you insights into where your time goes and help you identify areas where you can make adjustments.
Boost Your Energy: Perhaps you're like me, and you don't have energy for mentally taxing things after work. Recognize that energy levels can fluctuate throughout the day. To make the most of your productive hours, consider scheduling mentally taxing tasks during your peak energy times.
Establish Routines: Creating routines and simplifying your daily activities can also free up mental space and help you accomplish more.
Feel Free to Say No: Are there optional things taking up your precious time that you'd rather not be doing? Now's the time to Just Say No!
Set Specific Goals: Define clear, achievable goals for the tasks or activities you want to accomplish. Having specific objectives in mind can motivate you to manage your time more efficiently.
Personally, I'm actively working on changing my mindset, and deleting "I don't have time" from my vocabulary. I've also found that routines help a lot. I joined a gym (again) and hired a personal trainer, and now I don't have to think about when or where to exercise or what to do, I just show up at the scheduled time. Time blocking has also helped me immensely with staying focused at work. I’ll share more about that in a future post.
And if you're curious, here are some of the things on my list that need doing:
Create this blog. ✅
Finish my Treehouse course on JavaScript and Python.
Read How to Build s Second Brain and take the online course.
Finish (or restart and then finish) the Emotions course on Coursera.
Read volumes II and III of the Great Mental Models.
Take up painting—this one has a whole list of things that come before the actual painting happens. 😞
Meditate daily.
What’s on your list? Share in the comments!
Hang on to your spoons,
Brie
PS. Whenever I hear someone talk about spoons, my first thought is never spoon theory. I always think of this…